Podcasts (ten of them). Travel (fifteen times). Some concerts. Some deaths. My 2023 was more eventful than I realized.
I started it off right at the Quillette social in New Orleans, arriving close to midnight the night before with my pals Corinna Cohn and Nina Paley of Heterodorx podcast (and other) fame. Corinna and I did not however allow our exhaustion nor our advanced age stop us from ducking into a dimly lit dive bar with bare brick walls and imbibing a smoky red mezcal concoction like we were twenty-one.
Daytime festivities on Saturday were nearly as fun as the party itself. At breakfast I met Quillette founders Claire Lehmann and Jonathan Kay, who had recently written a wonderful review of my book and interviewed me for his podcast. Next were lattes, wine, and a rooftop pool party with Corinna; Nina; Testosterone author Carole Hooven; psychologist, journalist and substacker Pamela Paresky; genetics researcher Razib Khan, and others of note.
We wandered Bourbon Street in various configurations, trying on sequined blazers or sampling king cake. I visited a psychic who smeared grease paint all over herself, screamed that I should embrace my “dark side,” and doused me with a half dozen homemade perfumes.
It was New Orleans.
At the social itself I was pleased to meet biologist Colin Wright, Hate Crimes Hoax author Wilfred Reilly, and others. There was even a wedding. It was a good time, even if I left it losing $40 in a bet with Corinna, which I later delivered in quarters.
Also in January: I appeared on Meghan Murphy's The Same Drugs.
In February, I spoke with Women's Declaration International, a volunteer organization fighting for women's sex based rights, on their Feminist Question Time webinar. I also celebrated my five-year anniversary with my partner at the legendary Dee Felice, an amazing Cajun restaurant with white tablecloths and live Jazz in Covington, Kentucky. Good thing, I guess, as it seems to have since closed.
In March, I joined author Lisa Selin Davis for a Substack live chat.
In April, I attended an Unspeakeasy, the confidential retreat for “free-thinking women who crave honest conversations” hosted by very funny and smart author Meghan Daum. There I met Blocked and Reported legend Katie Herzog, and of course, her dog Moose. I'd tell you what else happened there, but then I'd have to kill you.
April is also when a beloved aunt died, and I wrestled with my guilt over losing touch with her. I traveled to attend her funeral, then traveled another time that month to attend an unrelated family event. I also hosted my cousin and his wife as houseguests for a few days—the one I traveled to St. Croix with as described in my memoir.
I traveled twice in May. First, I saw the Drive By Truckers, and more importantly, the incomparable Lydia Loveless in Columbus, Ohio. Then I attended the Cinema Systers Film Festival in Paducah Kentucky, whose goal is to “uplift the visions and voices of lesbian filmmakers.”
In June I spent a short solo retreat in West Baden, Indiana, to get some writing done. The esteemed Wilfred Reilly invited me to appear on his Cut the Bull podcast with co-hosts author Charles Love and author Shemeka Michelle, then hooked me up with a spot on Larry Glover Live.
Finally, I attended an outdoor concert to see an old fave, Ben Folds.
In July I celebrated my birthday at Holiday World, where I learned that I am, in fact, not twenty-one. I tweaked a hamstring riding one of the tamer of their four roller coasters, and it hasn't been the same since. Afterward I camped near Lincoln Boyhood National Memorial, a favorite childhood haunt.
I also did the Break It Down show with Pete Turner.
In August I took my partner to see Billy Joel and her fave Stevie Nicks in Columbus, Ohio for her birthday.
You can't beat my September, though. We spent a sun-drenched week of it in Nice, France, enjoying fresh seafood, pissaladiere, and the Mediterranean, punctuated by a quick jaunt to Ventimiglia, Italy to shop the expansive Friday market and sample authentic affogato, cannoli and tiramisu.
In October, I spent some time in historic New Harmony, Indiana, a town built on religious freedom and social reform that boasts several zenful outdoor spaces for meditation. I also did a speaking engagement for members of Feminists in Struggle (FIST), a female-only radical feminist network.
In late October, I'm sorry to say, a good friend committed suicide. Many took my article on that event as flash fiction, but it was a true story (and I really did have that weird dream near the same time). The man in question was a neighbor, a professional associate, and a friend. I've gone to his music gigs, ridden on his motorcycle, spent New Years Eves with him. He was the “biker” mentioned in the last chapter of my book, which he wholly supported. Take care of yourselves and your loved ones, folks.
November was an eventful month.
I spoke at the Genspect conference in Denver, where I met or brushed elbows with too many great people to mention: psychotherapists and authors Stella O'malley and Sasha Ayad, who'd interviewed me the prior year; biologist and author Heather Heying, who ended up featuring my story in a Substack article; other Blocked and Reported legend Jesse Singal; journalist and author Ben Appel; power couple Benjamin Boyce and Leslie Elliott, who featured me on their respective podcasts; historian and friend of the substack Matt Osborne; gender clinic whistleblower Jamie Reed; veteran psychiatrist Stephen Levine; researcher Leor Sapir; activist, anthologist and podcaster Zander Keig, author Wesley Yang, journalist Christina Buttons; and too many others to mention. The talks were brilliant and inspirational, and the conference deserves its own article, which I hope to get to someday.
Early Friday evening, I stepped away from the conference site for a wine-and-cheese gathering of local heterodox thinkers and Unspeakeasy alumni.
Oh yeah, and I traveled two additional times in November, first to West Palm Beach, Florida, then to visit family for Thanksgiving.
In December I spent a ladies' weekend in Louisville with some friends.
Podcasts I appeared on in November or December (it's a blur) include Heterodorx with Nina Paley; Calmversations with Benjamin Boyce; the Radical Center with Leslie Elliott, Solid Ground #47 with Leslie Elliott, Deborah Knox, and Jennifer Friend; and Federalist Radio Hour with Emily Jashinsky (recorded but not yet aired).
All in all it was a good year, and I have equally high hopes for 2024.
I get that.
Mike Cooley and Patterson Hood are local boys. I dated a cousin of one of them and I saw them in HS when they were Adam's House Cat. (That was the actual name of their band.) True story: they were playing a wedding in the early 1990s when a drunk redneck demanded they play "Free Bird" too loud, too often. Pat lit a paper airplane on fire and threw it at the guy, shouted "There's your fuckin' free bird" and started playing AC/DC instead.